Are you writing a fictional novel? Really? Is there a book inside of the book that you’re writing? Confused? Yes, I think you might be.
Today’s tip goes out to all of the fiction writers out there and really anyone who enjoys a good made-up story. Here it is, nice and simple:
Never describe a book as a “fictional novel.”
The Sochi Olympics reporters have had questionable use of feminine descriptors. I’m not even talking about the difference in “Women’s” Hockey versus “Ladies’” Figure Skating or the use of “girls” when commentators wouldn’t dream of calling male athletes “boys.” Those are semantic conversations unto themselves, and this isn’t the place for them. I’m talking about the use of “women” as an adjective. (Pssst… hey guys, put down your vodka samples. “Women” is a noun!)
When you’re looking for the adjective form of “women,” “female” is usually your best bet; however, time and time again, writers are using the wrong part of speech.
Everyone knows Forrest Gump’s mama was a wise lady, but she’s also a grammarian role model, nailing a subtle rule few know or follow. Everyone likes a good simile – especially Southerners – but whether you use “like” or “as” in your comparison is not simply a matter of pure choice.
To be brief, use “like” when no verb follows, and use “as” when the following clause contains a verb. We could get more technical and discuss prepositions and objects of the preposition versus the use of conjunctions, but that’s all of the dry grammar that scares people away from English classes. I like to keep things simple.
Back to Mama Gump:
Example 1: “Life is like a box of chocolates” – note no verb follows, so “like” is correct.
Example 2: “Stupid is as stupid does.” – since “does” is a verb, “as” is correct here.
In closing, to quote Forrest, “And that’s all I have to say about that.” Got it?
No offense to Faulkner, but I think he got one of his most famous titles wrong – then again, “While I Lay Dying” doesn’t really have the same ring to it. The question came up last week: what’s the difference between “while” and “as”? It’s a great query because there is a little-known, subtle change in meaning.
As you know, both words denote simultaneous action, but do you know the difference in the following two sentences?
“As Erin petted her cat, she wondered about word choice.”
“While Erin petted her cat, she wondered about word choice.”
At first glance, they seem to say the same thing; however, one of these is a brief action and one is longer. Erin either patted her cat on the head and walked away, or she cuddled up on her couch with her cat for the evening, continually stroking its fur while reading a good book. Word usage tells us the difference.
To be specific, “as” is used for a short action, and “while” is used for a longer one.
“As Faulkner picked up his pen, he debated his title.”
“While Faulkner wrote his book, he debated a grammatical rebellion.”
It doesn’t take long to pick up a pen. It does, however, take a long time to write a book. See the difference?
In As I Lay Dying, Addie’s death is a slow one, not immediate; therefore, “while” should be the appropriate word choice. But we can chalk this one up to artistic license. We can give Faulkner that.
As a closing note, here, I like to believe that the usage of “Lay” in this title is simply the past tense of “Lie.” If it’s present tense, we have a whole other lay/lie debate. (Oh the dramas of word choice!)
What is the past tense of pet? It’s a simple question, one you’re sure to answer with confidence. Then doubt creeps into the shadows of your mind. Surely, you know the correct answer. Of course, you know the right answer. Don’t you?
Today, Niki pets her dog. Yesterday, Niki… wait for it… petted her dog.
“No, no, no,” you might say. “The past tense of pet is definitely, ‘pet’!”
To those of you holding strong to your (incorrect) convictions, let me introduce the odd story of a regular verb made irregular. The past tense of “pet” has been “petted” for over 500 years. Fairly recently, “pet” has become regularly used and accepted in informal settings – largely by Americans, rebels that we are; however, in edited text, “petted” holds strong as the correct version.
Something to remember next time you watch another cute cat video on YouTube…
There’s a debate that arises every year—often intensified by champagne or eggnog. Is it “ring in the new year” or “bring in the new year”? Can you once and for all have a definitive answer to give that nut still wearing a Rudolph sweater? Perhaps, he’s thinking the same thing about you, the crazy lady in a little black dress who debates locution at holiday parties. (Or is that just me?)
Well, I hate to say it, but you’re both right. Though only different by a single letter, both expressions are recognized as standard. “Ringing in the new year” refers to the old tradition of celebrating beginnings and endings with bells—à la Alfred Lord Tennyson’s 1850 poem “Ring Out, Wild Bells.” On the other side of things, “bringing in the new year” references ushering in the new beginning. Thus, you can bring in the new year by ringing in the new year. How’s that for a fun answer to the debate?
Interesting side note: did you know New Year resolutions date back to ancient Babylon when people made good behavior promises to the gods? Any big promises you’re making this year?
Happy New Year, folks, and happy writing!
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It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas – not the August holiday frenzy that starts in stores, but real Christmas. That post-Thanksgiving nip in the air accompanied by twinkling lights and wreaths on doors. In the next couple weeks, I’ll see lots of my extended family for Christmas, including my three sisters-in-law. Or is it sister-in-laws?
Much like the tricky plural of passer-by, the ‘s’ is added onto the first word in the sequence, the central noun “sister.” Sisters-in-law, brothers-in-law, mothers-in-law, fathers-in-law – it’s a diverse world; the possibilities are endless. Just make sure your grammar doesn’t turn anyone against you.
I’m taking next week off, so happy holidays from the K. S. Writing Team! May you remember to compliment the maker your new homemade holiday sweater and to accept this year’s Paleo-fruit cake with graceful panache. Take care!
Some like to add ye olde character to the holidays – caroling, wassailing, and putting the yule log on the fire. I’m guessing that it’s in this spirit that people seem to misspell “wreath” as “”wreathe.” But this isn’t a word like “olde,” where you can add an “e” to create a pseudo-colonial, god-bless-ye-merry-gentlemen-of-yore vibe.
“Wreathe” isn’t just a quaint spelling of the holiday decoration or the floral headdress in your flower girl’s hair; rather, it’s the verb form meaning either to encircle or to decorate with a wreath. But you knew that already, right? I thought so. Just checking.
“Yeah, it’s time to decorate for Christmas.”
How do you read this sentence? Is it full of enthusiasm or badly hidden chagrin? This isn’t a judgment of your holiday spirit. It’s a judgment of your spelling.
To answer the question: Scrooge McDuck was never so casual with his speech, but the above line is more fitting for him than for your child’s Elf on a Shelf. (Yes, I said “McDuck.” Sorry, Charles Dickens, but the old Disney version will always be my favorite.)
Remember:
Yeah – casual “yes”
Yay – vocalized jubilation
Yea – the opposite of “nay” (for Robert’s rules of order fans)
Got it? Good. Now have fun untangling the Christmas lights. It’s worth it. I promise.
Over Thanksgiving I plan on eating a plethora of delicious food. You know what I mean? Seriously, do you? A “plethora” is an overabundance, as in a glut, as in too much of something. A “plethora” isn’t just lots. It’s an excessive amount. But you know what, on this holiday full of warmth and family and graciousness – and did I mention the homemade lattice-topped apple pie? – the calories don’t count. That’s my philosophy anyhow.
There’s so much to be thankful for this year, and correct word usage at the table is one of them. (Oh, how my family must love me!)